Forgiveness & the Missing Ingredient
June 8, 2009 by Standing on Truth
Filed under Christianity
I recently finished a book that I thought was going to be a review of information that I had heard much of my life — things about forgiveness that we’ve heard many times before. . .how unforgiveness is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die. . .bitterness is like a corosive acid in the beautiful vase it is contained in. . .we must forgive others because God has forgiven us. And yes, all of those are true, but after reading Nancy Leigh DeMoss’s book “Choosing Forgiveness,” I realized the ingredient that I had been missing all of these years.
Blessing.
If we have people in our life for whom we still feel those unsettling, unresolved emotions, then DeMoss says one of the reasons may be because “we haven’t yet moved on to more complete healing in these areas. . .we’ve stopped short of actually blessing those who have wronged us.”
It says in Romans 12, “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. . .Overcome evil with good” (vs. 20-21).
DeMoss continues, “When that person hurt you–that mate, that boyfriend, that parent, that ex-spouse, that college roommate, that aunt or uncle, that stranger who came out of nowhere to mar your life–he revealed that he has a need. A need he or she misappropriated at your expense. . .Ask God to show you the real need in your offender’s life. . .And see where God directs you to go next, until you actually begin finding joy–His joy–in blessing someone who’s treated you so badly. In so doing, you will overcome evil with good.”
Wise counsel. Not easy, especially when we have been hurt and feel that we have “rights,” but if it’s straight from the Word of God, it’s got to be right and effective.
